“How are you feeling?” the visitor asked.

“Oh,” said the lady, “I’m just worried sick!”

“What are you worried about, dear?” her friend asked.

“You look like you’re in good health. They are taking care of you,
aren’t they?”

“Yes, they are taking very good care of me.”

“Are you in any pain?” she asked.

“No, I have never had a pain in my life.”

“Well, what are you worried about?” her friend asked again.

The lady leaned back in her rocking chair and slowly explained her
major worry. “Every close friend I ever had has already died and gone on
to heaven. I’m afraid they’re all wondering where I went.”

(Source : jokes2u.com)

Source : http://holykaw.alltop.com/30-truly-amazing-wine-label-designs

Source : http://reflectionof.me/one-10190

The other day at work I ran into Bob. We chatted over lunch and he
dropped a bombshell on me.  ”Rodney” he said, “Becky and I are going to
get a divorce”.

I was stunned. “Why? What happened, you two seem so happy together”

“Well” he said, “ever since we got married, my wife has tried to change
me. She got me to stop drinking, smoking, running around at all hours of
the night and more. She taught me how to dress well, enjoy the fine
arts, gourmet cooking, classical music and how to invest in the stock
market.”

“Are you a little bitter because she spent so much time trying to
change you.” I probed.

“Nah, I’m not bitter. Now that I’m so improved, she just isn’t good
enough for me.”

Source: http://www.jokes2u.com/

Ted:  Hey, Jack, is Jenny coming with us?

Jack: Yes.  Why?

Ted:  Nothing.  I’m just asking.

Jack: just asking?  But why is your face burning like mad?  Ah-huh, someone has a crush on Jenny, doesn’t he?

Ted:  Who has a crush?!

Jack:  Come on, Ted, don’t be such a chicken.  If you like her, you’ve got to tell her.  Maybe she likes you.

Ted:   Well, I don’t have the guts to ask her out.

Jack:  What are you so afraid of?  Just tell her what you’re feeling about her.

Ted:   I’d totally die if she turned me down.

Jack: But that’s better than keeping everything to yourself.  You’ve got to let her know.  Come on! You’ve got to take a chance!  Even though you are rejected, it’s not the end of the world! There’s nothing to lose, is there?

Ted:  I don’t know….Well, maybe, you’re right, but how am I going to tell her?

Vocabulary:

ask someone out = นัดเดท

encourage = ให้กำลังใจ

have crush on someone = หลงรัก คลั่งใคล้

a chicken = คนขี้ขลาด

guts = ความกล้า กล้าหาญ เด็ดเดี่ยว

turn sb down = ปฏิเสธที่จะยอมรับ

take a chance = เสี่ยง

There’s nothing to lose, is there? = ไม่มีอะไรจะเสีย (จริงมะ)

Source: some parts are from http://english-learners.com/2010/01/ask-her-out.html?utm_source=feedburner&utm_medium=email